Alvin Greene Is Not For Real

Okay. I’m not one for conspiracy theories, even minor ones. However, after reading up on the Alvin Green fiasco in South Carolina, I am absolutely convinced that there is *something* up with the man. If you don’t believe me, first reflect on the following facts:

• Greene is an unemployed political novice.
• He does not have a website.
• He does not have any campaign literature.
• Nobody has been able to locate a single Greene campaign ad.
• He didn’t raise any money.
• He’s currently facing obscenity charges (more on that below).
• He doesn’t have any staff.
• He failed to file the requisite paperwork with the South Carolina Democratic Party after paying the filing fee with a personal check.
• He didn’t attend the South Carolina Democratic Convention.

Now, read the details of his obscenity charge:

Camille McCoy, a 19-year-old rising sophomore at the University of South Carolina, said she called campus police after Greene sat down next to her in a computer lab and asked her to look at his screen, which showed a pornographic website.

“I said, ‘That’s offensive,’ and he sat there laughing,” said McCoy, who was 18 at the time. “It was very disgusting. He said, ‘Let’s go to your room now.’ It was kind of scary. He’s a pretty big boy. He could’ve overpowered me.”

Now, observe his demeanor in this interview.

I generally think the idea that the two major parties would “plant” false candidates in the opposing party’s primaries is silly, and I’ve never accused a party of doing that before. That being said, if there ever was a Republican plant, it’s Alvin Greene. The absolute *only* reason I can’t say this with certainty is that I haven’t the slightest idea why the SC Republican Party would bother planting someone to run against Jim DeMint, who was going to win regardless of who the Democratic nominee was.

Regardless of what exactly it is, something is up here. Something’s fishy.

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